One afternoon Mama called, she'd left the aviary door open and her canaries had escaped, including many of the new hatchlings. I rushed over. "They're only babies," Mama cried. "They're sure to get lost or hurt!" Then I noticed Christian, our cat, lurking nearby. Uh-oh. Christian fixed his gaze on a tiny bird perched on a low branch. He sprang through the air and snatched the baby canary in his jaws. I covered my eyes. I couldn't watch. "My oh my!" Mama said. Strangely enough, I heard relief in her voice. I peeked through my fingers. Mama was just putting the captured bird back in its cage as the cat caught another one! He padded over to Mama and ever so gently placed the frightened ball of feathers in her hands. Then he rescued another. When he had seen all the escaped canaries safely home, Christian lay back down in the shade. He smiled, not like the cat who ate the canaries, but the angel who saved them.

When my mother began teaching, she was known as Miss Smeed to her Grade 1 students, or so she thought. She found out differently when she met one of the dads the following January. "I'm so glad to meet you," he said warmly. "Do you know it was Christmas before I found out your name wasn't Mincemeat?"

QUESTION: If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?

ANSWER: Their AGE.

"An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day." (Irv Kupcinet)

Two chubby duffers, ordered to play golf by their physicians, managed to get to the first tee. One duffer said, "I don't have the energy to play too long."

The other one said, "Okay. We'll quit as soon as either one of us gets a hole in one!"

Patti's six-year-old daughter Taryn stood in front of the bathroom mirror looking at herself. Her parents always told her how much she looked like them. "You have Daddy's eyes," Patti said. Taryn removed her shirt, pointed to her chest and said, "And I have Daddy's boobs."

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving," little Sara wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."

ODE TO THANKSGIVING

May your stuffing be tasty

May your turkey plump,

May your potatoes and gravy

Have nary a lump.

May your yams be delicious

And your pies take the prize,

And may your Thanksgiving dinner

Stay off your thighs!

MORE THAN A DAY (Karl Fuchs)

As Thanksgiving Day rolls around,

It brings up some facts, quite profound.

We may think that we're poor,

Feel like bums, insecure,

But in truth, our riches astound.



We have friends and family we love;

We have guidance from heaven above.

We have so much more

Than they sell in a store,

We're wealthy, when push comes to shove.



So add up your blessings, I say;

Make Thanksgiving last more than a day.

Enjoy what you've got;

Realize it's a lot,

And you'll make all your cares go away.

THANKSGIVING DINNER POEM, SONG AND PRAYER (Joanna Fuchs)

Our table is set now; great food you can bet now.

It’s Thanksgiving Day, and we’re ready to eat;

All those near and dear to us are here today to cheer us.

This dinner is a winner, a wonderful treat.



It’s time to be thankful for all that God gives us;

Dear Lord, we are grateful; Dear God, hear our prayer.

It’s You we are praising; our voices we are raising;

Bless us and bless this food; keep us safe in your care.

Two pilgrims go out hunting. One has two blunderbusses.

The second pilgrim asks, "Why do you have two blunderbusses?"

The first pilgrim explains, "I usually miss the first time I shoot. By taking two I can shoot again."

The second pilgrim thinks for a while and then says, "Why not just take the second one, and only shoot once?"

When they take out your appendix, they call it an appendectomy. When they take out your tonsils, they call it a tonsillectomy.

What do they call it when they remove a growth from your head? A haircut.

QUESTION: What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?

ANSWER: God save the kin.

Mr. Gobbler said, "Doctor, help me! I can't stop acting like a turkey!"

"I see," said the doctor. "How long have you had this problem?"

"Let me think a second. Mom laid the egg in 1954..."

What would you get if you crossed Jessee James and Count Dracula?

A robbery at the blood bank.

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a dog!

DOCTOR: Sit!

Q: Why did the grown-up cows worry about the little cow?

A: Because it was so mood-dy.

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